Blanketing opinions that I'll probably regret soon.

Monday, July 10, 2006

I hear outboard motors make good anchors.

To a sailor, a boat motor is a spiteful bitch; it's pissed off from being neglected 90% of the time, so when the wind dies, it will function on its own terms. Never trust an outboard, and always have towing insurance. Oh, and make lots of jokes about converting your outboard into an anchor in its presence. That will frighten it into starting and running every time.
That's what oars are for.
In that case, Cuff, you can come on my boat any time you want.
I'm a landlubber. The extent of my boatification is the Cape May-Lewes Ferry and renting a little fishing boat from Bahia Marina in Ocean City for some flounder fishing in the Sinepuxent Bay.
We almost jettisoned an almost-new 8hp Honda last summer, after endless efforts to coax it into idling after the previous owners of the boat had left it over the winter without draining the gas.

I tried threatening it, smacking it and force-feeding it starting fluid, but in the end the only thing that worked was new sparkplugs.

I still hate that motor.
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