Talkin' Shit About A Pretty Sunset

(a post by Matlow Toldmie)

Money is best used by people who focus on what they love.

In my case, that means three things: 1) the most beautiful daughters God ever blessed the Earth with; 2) my lovely wife; and 3) my 1960s Sunfish.

In people's heads, sailing is a prohibitively expensive hobby, but that mindset taken to its final conclusion will land you in a nursing home, whining about your regrets to a bunch of wannabe golf pros.

I recently bought a Sunfish which moves with the wind only when I man-handle her like a dirty slut. The boat is older than me by countless decades and when I first saw her, she was crawling with a colony of slugs.

After coaxing a decent price out of a co-worker, I managed to get him down to $150 (sucker).

The old bitch is cracked and water logged --- I practically slip a disc each time I hump it on and off my car --- but whatever. I own a boat, BITCH. And I use it, too, which is more than some of those rich bastards who have fancy dinners onboard without leaving the slip can say.

I sail it like a three-armed retard, but I look forward to the day I ram my floating slug motel into the side of some guy's Bénéteau and steal his rum.

I call my Sunfish Pinkie. Got a problem with that name?