Blanketing opinions that I'll probably regret soon.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

All gringos sound embarrassing speaking Spanish. Even me.

When I was learning Spanish while working at an ESL school for five years I would take any opportunity to practice. I was "that guy" who'd try and order food at a Mexican restaurant in Spanish and Spangle my way through conversations about student visas or ESL class schedules at work---all the while carrying my Spanish/English electronic translator in my pocket. Because of that, I can tell you the Spanish word for some pretty arcane vocab. Some words I learned were so obscure, that my Venezuelan friend Juan Carlos had never heard of them.

The good part is that I can now hold my own when I visit Spanish speaking countries, but the bad part is that I submitted myself to some serious douchebaggery in the process.

Nowadays, I try and avoid speaking Spanish in the US, mainly due to the cringe-inducing accents I hear from my fellow gringos. Even gringos who use proper accents are painful to listen to, not just because of how they sound, but because of the pretension that goes with it. "Hey, look at me. I'm so cultured because I speak more than one language." And the worst is when a gringo speaks Spanish to a latino who speaks English. What's the need for that? It's obvious to the rest of us that the purpose is simply to show off.

It's a mystery why a language can sound so nice spoken by one group, but so embarrassing spoken by another. ¡Ay chihuahua!
I have a similar story. My ex could speak a bit of Chinese very badly. Watching this white guy speak bad Chinese to a Chinese person who could speak better English than him was just embarrassing. He wasn't even trying to brush up, he was just trying to show how smart he was and made himself look like a rude a-hole in the process.
what's even worse is when people try to speak pig latin and do THAT horribly!
Tengo un dolor de muela que me vuelve loco.
¿Tu tambien?
I speak fluent cat. I know I've really bungled a word when they sit down and periscope their leg up to clean themselves.
Sie haben recht!

Ich weisse eine unbrauchbare Sprache.

Und ich habe sie nicht sehr gut.
I think your posts are seriously getting funnier by the day.

That said, I'm glad you don't throw your spanglish around for the hell of it anymore.
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