Blanketing opinions that I'll probably regret soon.

Friday, June 09, 2006

My Photoshop Work: The Out-takes

I can't get over the hilarity of Adobe Photoshop. While jaded Mac-users might have a blasé attitude towards cutting friends' heads out and putting them onto J-Lo's body, it hasn't gotten old for me and still splits my sides with laughter.

While I've put many of my best works on this website, below I give you some of my lesser known pieces, simply for your personal enjoyment.

This was what happened when my friend asked me to put her into a scene with The Captain (of Captain and Tennille) and Lawrence Welk:

My friends Jim and Fruzie were wanting to host a Fourth of July party at the beach, and I pitched this flyer to them to promote it. For some reason, my email never received a response. It's either not going to happen, or I'm not invited any more ...

This faux movie poster was meant to inspire enthusiasm for my five day sailing trip. Universal Pictures was not pleased.

The story for this masterpiece is too long and funny to tell. One day, it will get its own post ...

In case you haven't been following the Volvo Ocean Race, this is what happened to the Spanish yacht, Movistar. Davey Jones' Locker, people.

Ok, technically this isn't a Photoshop job, but it's just a really handsome picture of me about three years ago.

You may be offended by the below picture, but believe me, I originally meant Matt's picture to be included in the aftermath of the Reagan assassination. I was just getting bored that night, so ...

This one was meant to get Derek and Greg's attention right before the sailing trip. It was titled, "Where the Fuck Are Derek and Greg?" Photoshop is very useful in times of need.

I put this together to get my friends geared up for going polka dancing in Maryland. From left (the heads): G.G. Allin, Johnny Rotten, Jim W., Sid Vicious, My lovely wife, Matt G., me, Isaac Washington (of DC Drinks).

About two years ago, I was obssessed with the Reagan assassination and its aftermath. There was one government agent, in particular, that I couldn't get out of my mind. So much so, that I Photoshopped him into a picture with me. See if you can spot him here.

If the Movistar story (above) is ever made into a feature, they better choose my poster.
You're clearly very busy. I have to get cracking on my photoshop skilz. Back in the good old days, before things like "computers" made life easier, I used to do mockups the old fashioned way: cutting out real photos and putting them together under glass and taking a photo of the result. Crude, but effective.
high five on getting us into the Express yesterday, dude. Maybe we can take this kickball show on the road.
That's it: I deserve my own column in Wash Post Express. They've now quoted me three days in a row. Have they no one better to quote?
Nice PS skills. Very impressive, something I have always meant to do is take some of my personal home movies and make some kind of DVD I can send to friends.

btw, grats on the recognition. I could only pray for such attention, my only reader is my best friend it seems...*tear*.
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