Talkin' Shit About A Pretty Sunset

You may not believe it, but until one month ago I did not own a Hawaiian shirt. A sad fact indeed. But one day I noticed my neighbor Peggy wearing the above shirt and complimented her so she just offered it to me. I tried to refuse but later she dropped it on my porch (I assume she did not walk over wearing only her bra).

When you wear a Hawaiian shirt --- no matter if you're skinny, medium-sized or heavyset --- you feel like a fat party animal. It's a strange and good feeling and I rolled with it all evening at the beach. I wished I was 50 pounds heavier so it would feel more authentic.