Talkin' Shit About A Pretty Sunset

I've been trying to sell my couch on Craigslist for a week. It's been hard to coordinate the first-comers and the late-comers, so what I've done is tell the late-comers to call me shortly after the first-comers visit me. But not everyone has been happy about that system. Especially this d-bag:

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Date: Thu, 5 Jan 2006 17:22:16 -0500
Subject: Re: IKEA pullout couch with cover - $35
To: Lonnie Bruner
From: Manny V

Oh my, I think u are very rude, u asked me to contact u today and now u tell me wait until saturday. I cannot believe that u are very rude. I wonder why woman don't want to buy your couch. Good luck!

Swoosh manny
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Yes, he really did write "swoosh manny".

I considered three possible reactions:

1) The Witty Curse-out. For example, I could have responded:

Dearest Swoosh Manny,

By policy, I'm never rude on accident. Therefore, you can suck my sweaty cock. And make sure to control your goddamned gag reflex, bitch.

Kind regards,
Lonnie Bruner

2) Simply send him the URL of a Goatse. No, I'm not going to re-post a goatse on my blog, but it's an image that apparently causes irreversible mental damage.

3) No response. Sometimes the best response to a d-bag is none at all. It's often the best way of saying fuck you.

Such are the dilemmas of the modern age ...